May 21, 2011

May 21, 2011.

Remember that day and get ready because that's the day Jesus returns and the world ends. Or so says "biblical scholar" Harold Camping in an article in the San Francisco Chronicle.

I was at the farmers market yesterday and someone was offering free copies of the SF Chronicle. I said thanks but I stopped reading the Chronicle years ago. Less than 24 hours later I had a stark reminder of why.

From the San Francisco Chronicle, a ridiculous excuse for a newspaper...

By Camping's understanding, the Bible was dictated by God and every word and number carries a spiritual significance. The number 5, Camping concluded, equals "atonement." Ten is "completeness." Seventeen means "heaven."

"Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D.," he began. "Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that's 1,978 years." Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days - the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500. Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500. Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

"I tell ya, I just about fell off my chair when I realized that," Camping said.

There was a time when newspapers conducted real journalism and didn't pander to irrational niches. That time has clearly passed for the Chronicle and it's a shame.